(With apologies to
William Shakespeare and to King Richard III, formerly of Leicester Social
Services car park.)
Enter Richard III, who in this production
closely resembles David Cameron
Now is the winter of our discontent
Made yet more chill by inglorious mutiny.
And all the clouds that lour'd upon our
house
Weigh deep in the bosom of this accursed king.
Behind him and at his side, an army --
Not of faithful friends and stalwart
yeomen,
But of weak and fickle traitors,
Who will not act 'pon their king's command
Yet murmur in the shadows of plots and
treason.
Instead of mounting barded steeds
To fright the souls of fearful adversaries,
They plead and whimper
Of conscience, opportunely-found.
They know not love nor loyalty,
Neither in this House nor 'twixt the
sheets.
Instead, they yowl of God's law
And swoon clean away
Lest man should marry man
Or woman woman.
Enter
a messenger, breathless
My Lord, I bring word from the Tower
Where your nephews, the Princes,
Lie, abandoned, in their chains.
They bid me plead their case, to save them
From the wrath of Gove
And his foul determination to torment them
With further agonies and examinations
Which -- they cry -- no mortal human could
bear.
Enter
a second messenger, also breathless
My Lord, I come direct from blasted Surrey
Heath,
Whence the good lord Gove bids you know
That all is now for nought.
Your enemies, now, are also his --
Where once were liberal hearts,
Are only foes, filled not with love for
you,
But with hatred and resolve
To thwart you both at every turn.
Your project is undone,
And dangers loom e'en greater than before.
Richard/Cameron
tears off his cloak in a rage
Morse! Morse! My kingdom for Morse!
Get ye to Oxford and bid the wise old
man
I have need of him post-haste
To show me the colour of mine enemies,
To root them out and make this land
As once it was, fair and just,
A place fit for Cameroons as yet unborn.
Bid him join us on the fields of Eastleigh
Where we shall fight like lions
And smite our foes, where'er they be.
Exeunt,
stage (centre) right
4 comments:
Morse could be:
a. Inspector Morse;
b. Morse code;
c. MORSE (Mathematics, Operational Research, Statistics and Economics), an honours degree at Warwick University;
d. MORSE (Modular Open Robots Simulation Engine) a generic simulator for academic robotics;
e. Morse, an IT services and technology company; or,
f. ReMorse (Inspector Morse again)!
Thanks Robin.
Made my blizzard filled day in Boston!
I was thinking Inspector Morse!!!
Where is he when you really need him anyway!!!
With Cameron presently up to his ankles in the shifting Saharan sand dunes - dodging the ´slings and arrows´will become more difficult as the daggers are drawn and he sinks deeper.
--He can only hope his foes do not want to inherit another war and quagmire.
An ambitious idea for a newsletter! A challenge that you have set yourself; bravely risen to; and hopefully been rewarded by, upon re-reading what has turned out to be an excellent execution. Most enjoyable!
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